I will put my hands up and admit that I am a huge fan of anal play, not only does it significantly increase pleasure but with it being taboo it makes it so much more naughtier.
Yet to a beginner it can be an incredibly daunting experience to try and who can blame them for feeling like this? Being brought up with the notion that the anus is dirty and a no go area, it is understandable why many of us is/was so reluctant to try anal play. In my late teens I vowed I would never do anything that involves anal. The thought of it just grossed me out and I believed the only thing I would gain from it would be excruciating pain.
It wasn’t until my early twenties that I became comfortable with the idea of anal play, by then it was becoming more popular and more advice was giving on the practice than ever before. There are many ways to get started in anal play; some people prefer just to go straight into it with a partner whilst others like to explore themselves first.
Lubricant is a must for anal play; unlike the vagina the anus doesn’t create hardly as much lubrication so it needs a lot of it for you to have a comfortable experience. You may see in porn films that they only use saliva, this however is not true and most porn stars are lubricated beforehand.
There are many types of lubricants on the market for anal play: Lubricants designed for anal are usually silicone based and have a much thicker consistency than others. Water based lubricants are also good for anal play but tend to dry out much more faster than silicone so you will regularly have to add more. Flavored lubricants, heated lubricants and tingly lubricants can cause irritation so they are definitely a no go in that department.
Fingers v toys
Whether you use fingers or a toys is your own choice, I personally went for toys first but fingers are just as good. Before you insert make sure that your toys or fingers are clean and lubricated. There are many beginner toys on the market now for anal play and they come in all different shapes, sizes and materials but remember that jelly and rubber materials are more porous so you may need to put a condom on it. After use, always wash your toy with warm/hot water and a sex toy cleaner. It is also a good idea to never share your anal toys or use them for vaginal insertions.
Men can also get in the act of anal play too, with many toys now designed to stimulate the prostate gland.
You either love it or hate it but rimming is when you lick around the anus. This can be quite daunting to most and it is understandable why. If you are curious about rimming (either receiving or giving) but nervous then preparation is key. Washing yourself before the act can make you feel more comfortable and confident with it. Others douche before any rimming or anal play. Douches are great if you like to feel clean inside but be aware that it is not healthy to douche everyday as it can damage your anus’s own naturally lubrication.
One of the most important things to do in anal play is to relax. If you are tensed up then your anus will be tense too, making it harder to insert you’re toy/finger but can also cause discomfort and possible damage in anal play. I found that masturbating first helped me a lot to de-tense plus using plenty of lubrication.
Rome wasn’t built in a day
Some people can go straight into anal play with no discomfort whilst others like me needed more time. Don’t be discouraged if you was unable to fully insert anything into you’re anus, with more practice it really does become easier J .
If at any point you do feel discomfort or pain then stop immediately, this is a sign that you’re anus can’t cope with the adjustments just yet. When removing your finger or toy always remove it slowly, as pulling it out quickly could not only be painful but cause some damage.
Thank you for reading my blog 🙂
Love Vivienne Violet